Friday, June 08, 2007

Scary Gym Part II

After BoyBoy's meltdown at The Scary Gym I considered switching to their second location, a much larger and fully equipped location, in Bellevue.

It's so huge it quite possibly requires its own hydroelectric dam. This metropolis in the suburbs is complete with, a spa, salon, a botox spa, and super duper daycare that allows you to leave your BoyBoy and go off-site. This seemed like a glorious option given I get 2-3 hours a week of alone time, when Mrs. Doubtfire comes.

Well, it wasn't meant to be. We went there yesterday to sign on the dotted line but I chickened out and decided to stay urban.

I'm left with 2 conclusions.
1. I'm a really amazing and self-less mom because there is no way in hell I'll leave BoyBoy there.
2. I'm incredibly stubborn when it comes to maintaining my urban cool and giving in to suburban conveniences.

The reasons behind my super self-less momitude:
I suffered a bought of post-traumatic-stress upon entering--I went to daycare from 6 weeks on and hated it (Mom, if you're reading this, don't)--everything about this place reminded me of what I hated as a kid, namely:
no natural light,
feeding assembly lines,
and kids were aimlessly spinning in circles with nothing to do.

And for my "keep it cool, keep it urban" reasoning:
The art is horrendous. Imagine commissioning Thomas Kincade and The Happy Painter to paint scenes of a rainbow of people working out, children engaging story time at the daycare, and for a fantasy art experience, a triptych of a gymnast spinning in outer space, an outer space which happens to include Mt. Rainier. This art, hung like masterpieces (I'm talking huge prints), is everywhere.
The carpet is totally Las Vegas casino.
The parking garage is filled with BMWs, Mercedes and Mini-Vans, all of which freaks me out--it's a rich breeder gym.
Their spa is decorated like a Roman Bath, unfortunately minus the vomitorium, and has the following treatments: The Journey to the Fountain of Youth, The Royal Journey, and the Gentleman's Journey.

So, I'm sticking with the big city version of the scary gym which has natural light, views of the city scape, and a very tiny daycare.

1 comment:

Lindsay said...

Well written.
Are we the best moms? Or are we neurotic first time mothers? ha-ha. I'm right there with you.
My mom went back to work at 6 weeks too.
Think I'm headed to the looney bin with this separation anxiety phase, that both Benny and I seem to be having.